I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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