What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
