I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize