I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
