I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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