Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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