i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Randomize
