I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
