She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
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I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
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Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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