For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
