Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
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He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize