coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
