We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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