69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
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