I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize
