Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.