The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
