i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Randomize
