god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
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i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
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Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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