she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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