you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
