Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I bet he comes in French.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
You're like the curious george of whores
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize