I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
my liver is dry heaving
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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