508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
dude. I can hear the air.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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