How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
As shirtless as possible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
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