Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
