Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
what day is it and did you see me today?
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.