Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  My new storm is the chrons

  (248): View more from Michigan

  The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one

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  (248): My new storm is the chrons (248): The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one<div>(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one</div> http://tfl.nu/7nnd
  Replies (5) Good night (2067) Bad night (786)
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  (409): View more from Texas

  so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes

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  (409): so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes http://tfl.nu/m5en
  Replies (5) Good night (876) Bad night (959)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian

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  (616): David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview? (773): Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian http://tfl.nu/r8u6
  Replies (4) Good night (2578) Bad night (615)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.

  (1-405): View more from Oklahoma

  which gay bar do you need a ride home from?

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  (405): Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you. (1-405): which gay bar do you need a ride home from? http://tfl.nu/2t13
  Replies (14) Good night (1583) Bad night (4917)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys

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  (781): They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys http://tfl.nu/3nq8
  Replies (33) Good night (4905) Bad night (856)
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  (260): View more from Indiana

  dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?

  (1-260): View more from Indiana

  what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing

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  (260): dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian? (1-260): what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing http://tfl.nu/axih
  Replies (51) Good night (18389) Bad night (1371)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.

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  (989): I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic. http://tfl.nu/vt43
  Replies (16) Good night (4589) Bad night (740)
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  (870): View more from Arkansas

  you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.

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  (870): you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions. http://tfl.nu/7qp6
  Replies (29) Good night (8409) Bad night (869)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.

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  (207): I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something. http://tfl.nu/x6k7
  Replies (21) Good night (6849) Bad night (1023)
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  (+64): View more from New Zealand

  I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.

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  (+64): I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable. http://tfl.nu/t0un
  Replies (4) Good night (2427) Bad night (1120)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order

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  (604): In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order http://tfl.nu/d2l0
  Replies (1) Good night (1242) Bad night (551)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.

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  (757): I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know. http://tfl.nu/rhaa
  Replies (1) Good night (839) Bad night (419)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.

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  (304): You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob. http://tfl.nu/lajt
  Replies (17) Good night (556) Bad night (912)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.

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  (440): The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch. http://tfl.nu/uy0f
  Replies (2) Good night (863) Bad night (277)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.

  (1-205): View more from Alabama

  I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy

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  (205): Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies. (1-205): I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy http://tfl.nu/dpsc
  Replies (4) Good night (424) Bad night (256)

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