Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Randomize
