It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
