And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
