My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
