Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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