problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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