This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize