I love black thongs
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
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