How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize