i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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