we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I AM VODKA MAN
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
