Me too!
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Randomize
