real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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