I accidentally burped into my bong.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
