im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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