Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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