I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize