Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
