so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
