First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
