Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
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