I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
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