Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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