There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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